The British Foreign Minister has been admitted to a hospital in Burma’s capital. He was suffering from the delusion that he was about to be mobbed by 100,000 women mistaking him for Trump. Despite photographic evidence of a deranged Boris being taken to the facility by military police, a British Government spokesperson, speaking to Private Tye, has denied the report.
The Government says that Boris was not delusional at all. They point out that the mob of 100,000 angry women (many with beards) was something any sane person should be scared of. They point out that Boris and Trump have the same barber, they are both overweight and that both are in the habit of saying incredibly stupid things for no apparent reason. A recent survey has shown that nine out of ten British women can not tell the difference between Trump and Johnson. They also pointed out that many of the marchers thought they were marching against Brexit.
Another prevalent belief, amongst the marchers, is that Boris intends to build a wall between Britain and France by bricking up the channel tunnel. The spokesmen said that this was ridiculous because Boris enjoys frogs legs and snails very much.
The real purpose of the Burmese visit was to discuss trade. After Brexit, Burma will, most likely, be Britain’s leading trade partner. In fact it could be Britain’s only trade partner, so trade is very important. The problem is that there are 2,700,000 Muslims living in Britain while Burma is in the process of committing genocide against its own Rohingya Muslim minority. So poor old Boris has the job of securing a nice trade deal with Sukee (the Burmese leader) and at the same time convince British Muslins that he is trying to persuade Sukee to stop the genocide.
So the furry creature is out of the bag. It is not a mob of anti-Trump women that he is afraid of, but a mob of one million Muslim women pissed off because he has done nothing to help the Rohingya.
From Frontier Myanmar (Facebook page 22 Jan):
British Foreign Secretary Boris Johnson visited Yangon General Hospital on Saturday January 21 as part of a two-day trip to Myanmar.
Mr Johnson had earlier met with State Counsellor Daw Aung San Suu Kyi where the pair discussed economic reforms, trade and human rights, including Rakhine State.
From Eleven (whatever that is) 21 Jan:
Suu Kyi [pronounced "Sukee" ed.] hosts dinner with Boris Johnson
State Counsellor Aung San Suu Kyi hosted an honorary dinner for a British delegation led by Foreign Secretary Boris Johnson at her residence on January 20, according to the Ministry of Foreign Affairs.
During the meeting, they discussed boosting cooperation in bilateral relations, education, health care and economic sectors. Their discussions also focused on the peace process and democratisation efforts, said the ministry.
Other ministers and British Ambassador Andrew Patrick also joined the state dinner.
The British foreign secretary also met the military-appointed Minister of Home Affairs, Lieutenant General Kyaw Swe, and the new national security adviser, Thaung Tun, according to the ministry.
Johnson will meet the Rakhine State Advisory Commission and other NGOs in Yangon and visit Shwedagon Pagoda and Yangon General Hospital during his three-day tour.
It is the most significant UK visit since then prime minister David Cameron's trip in 2012.
Johnson said: “Myanmar’s transition to democracy is not yet complete but it is worth reflecting on just how far Myanmar has come since Aung San Suu Kyi’s National League for Democracy party took office just nine months ago. Launching a major new peace initiative, establishing a commission led by Kofi Annan to resolve tensions in Rakhine and releasing more than 300 political prisoners are positive steps. It is clear that many challenges remain and full reform will take time.
"The UK, as a longstanding and long-term friend to Myanmar, will continue to offer its fullest support. I look forward to seeing Burma continue to develop into a country where there is peace and prosperity for all its people,” in a statement released by the British Foreign Office.