With Britain withdrawing from the EU half a million British pensioners living in Spain will soon be forced to leave. Thailand's Minister of Foolish Foreign Fogies has said they will be most welcome in Thailand. We love British pensioners here, he remarked, they buy our Ponzi scheme, jerry-built condominiums for fantastic prices. They keep our private hospitals in business because they need to see a Doctor every time they have a cold or a belly-ache from eating Thai food. Our Dentists think they are great because they all have rotten teeth from living off a diet of chocolate bars when they were young. They swallow the output of an entire Thai brewery every day. And all they want is a grotty bar, decorated with British flags and old copies of the Daily Mirror, which shows non-stop football matches on the telly. Give them this and they will just sit around all day, drinking and complaining about everything.
The Ministry has offered a special invitation to David Cameron, who will soon be out of a job and will not be welcome in Europe or Britain.
Aljazeera had the boring story:
Some 761,000 Britons live in Spain, mostly pensioners living a sunny retirement on the Costa del Sol. Largely leading quiet lives, many would have been at the shops if Sunday had been a normal day, snapping up the new Malaga version of the board game, Monopoly.
But the Brexit vote has caused storm clouds to gather, keeping many inside worrying over endless cups of tea.
Will the excellent - and for this group, essential - healthcare they receive from Spain's public health system end in two years? Will they be forced to return to a cold, rainy England and a broken NHS?
Spaniards dependent upon Britons are worried, too. Property agents know there aren't enough Germans or Finns to buy all the surplus housing.
And there is a vast service industry in southern Spain dependent upon Brits. Spanish waiters, plumbers, cashiers and gardeners will not find jobs on the Costa - or anywhere else - if more than half a million Britons leave.