Dear Dr Shipman, My name is Banky Loon and I am the most important person in the entire world. It is my job to defend UN Peace-keepers from everybody else and to make sure that they do not injure themselves when running away from conflicts. My problem is that I have developed an uncontrollable urge to roll over on my back to let the US Ambassador to the UN tickle my belly. Is there anything that can be done about this?
Dear Mr Loon, It seems that you were born without a spine. This causes a condition which we Doctors call lapus dogus. It means that you will always follow the most powerful people around and delight in performing tricks for them. Like all lapdogs you have grown old and your owners have become bored with you. You need to be put down. Come to my surgery and I'll put you out of your misery.